The Real World Sucks?

Sometimes, the real world sucks.

But it can also be downright fabulous. I just got back from a four week vacation (ok, real world for teachers) during which I purchased the new iPhone 4s. Let me tell you, it is worth every hundred. The best feature is the iMessage option, which allows you to send free texts to other 4s models worldwide. That, along with Facetime and Skype, make staying in-touch abroad extremely convenient.

Today, as I zipped along on my e-bike, I felt a tug on my earphones and my Chinese language tape suddenly stopped. I looked down and realized that my phone had dislodged from my coat pocket. Quickly breaking to a halt, I looked backwards but failed to spot my phone. Still on my bike, I looked to a man and several people walking next to me and asked if they had seen my phone. Although none of them spoke English (shocker), they pointed ahead just in time for me to see two young men on a illegal street bike swerve and right themselves. They continued to gesture furiously and it suddenly clicked that these men had just stolen my phone.

Although the moment from theft to realization had taken less than 25 seconds, my disbelief and slow reaction time provided enough opportunity for them to escape (this is why I am bad at sports and video games).

I sped to the next intersection and frantically asked the policeman (every major intersection has a traffic guard, check out the driving and you will understand why) and all around if anyone could speak English. A Chinese man in his late twenties told me that he could speak English and I hurriedly explained the situation. He called the police station and we went into a nearby bank to wait for someone to arrive.

The man introduced himself to me as King and assured me that he didn't mind waiting with me since he telecommuted to work in Fenton, Michigan. I relayed the entire situation, or what I could remember since it had all happened so quickly. A cop car finally arrived and drove 'the King and I' (sorry, I couldn't help it) to the nearest police station. After giving my statement and signing it with my John Hancock and 5 thumbprints (yeah, they do that) we were whisked off to the main police station for further red tape.

The next time someone says something bad about the Chinese government, I will punch them in the face. Seriously though, my experience with the Chinese police force was nothing less than awesome. When my good samaritan and I walked into the station, we were met by two officers which quickly grew to 10. Everyone was eager to help me and gave me kleenex, water and use of the internet on their official computers. They checked the facts of my situation and called another department to make sure that someone else didn't need to be involved too since I was a foreigner.

The policemen helped me call my cell phone company and threw their weight around when they refused to cancel my sim card without a physical copy of my passport. The officers asked King what I did in China. They were shocked when they heard all the subjects that I taught and were even more surprised when they learned that I taught Physics.... to Chinese students... in English. They asked what I studied in school and how I found my job. King was a bit confused himself when I explained that I majored in Advertising and Public Relations but he rolled with it.

As it neared lunch time, they asked my new friend and I if we wanted to leave or join them in the canteen. Knowing that they fully expected me to reject their offer, I shocked them all by accepting. Five police guards proudly escorted me to the cafeteria and I enjoyed a meal that far out passed my greasy school lunches.

I had full run of the police station all afternoon and explored the various rooms (my favorite was a room labeled 'sober-up room' with beds) and courtyards. I am upset that I wasn't able to take pictures of the facilities (they only allowed one in the cafeteria) because it was by far the cleanest building I have seen in China, surpassing the hospitals by far.

=I would be lying if I said today was a great day. It sucked. After waiting a month to get my hands on the new iPhone, it was stolen from me and I will not be able to replace it. But I gained a new friend, got to eat lunch with the city's finest and experience a level of cleanliness that I didn't think existed in this country. So although I am still truly upset about losing my mobile security blanket and the constant contact with my loved ones back home, the real world does not suck overall. My problems are first world problems and, who knows, maybe someone reading this will buy me an iPhone. Any interested parties can feel free to e-mail me. 再见